My Sorrow Bath

I received a pretty amazing birthday present last year. My husband who is the absolute best and most supportive partner ever, chose to get me a gift to support my love for all things Keanu. He happened upon his poem by Keanu after watching him on Between Two Ferns with Zach Galifinakos.  The poem goes a little something like this:

ODE TO HAPPINESS by Keanu Reeves

I draw a hot sorrow bath
in my despair room
with a misery candle burning
i wash my hair with regret shampoo
after cleaning myself with pain soap
i dry myself with my gorgeous white
one hundred percent and it will never change towel
then smooth on my i don't deserve lotion
and i hate myself face cream
then I put on my alone again silk pyjamas
and go to sleep
when the hue has gone blue
and you can't quite grin and bear it
let this word picture remind you
it can always be worse

My husband found the poetry book written by Keanu and illustrated by artist Alexandra Grant, now officially known to be romantically involved with Keanu. Unfortunately with the book being intended as an art piece with only few copies released, the book itself was put squarely out of our price range. Fortunately he was creative enough to come up with a new solution, and instead of gifting me the poem, he gifted me my own experience of the poem so that I could have my own sorrow bath.

Well after many months, I was finally able to take advantage of the experience this weekend. I think I did it wrong though because I clearly enjoyed my sorrow bath a little too much. Lighting the misery candle made me grin ear to ear. My pain soap hurt so good and exfoliated so well. My alone again silk pyjamas were worn as I got into my bed completely not alone. I had way too much fun in my despair room laughing out loud to Ali Wong's book Dear Girls as she compared her husband to not John Wick Keanu Reeves, not The Matrix Keanu Reeves, but Speed Keanu Reeves.

It was such a joy to finally take advantage of this generous gift and actually take a moment to really appreciate the poem. I love it so much because I think it can be both completely heartbreaking and completely hysterical depending on the kind of emotional release you need at a given time. As one who is often hard on myself it was actually fun to put on my I don't deserve lotion while saying the words out loud. The irony was not lost on me as I reflected that I hadn't even given myself the chance to have this bath for five months.

Like all art I'm sure not everyone will share my experience with this poem, but for me it is a beautiful gift. So thank you Keanu! And thank you Luke! I look forward to my next sorrow bath.


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